How to get a threesome as a single person

When trying to find out how to go about getting a threesome, you’ll find most articles out there focus almost exclusively on the perspective of the couple looking for a third – usually a woman.

As a single person you’re at a bit more of a disadvantage when it comes to actionable advice. You can probably learn some insights from the other articles, but all in all it’s tough getting advice on finding a third, if you haven’t even found a second yet.

We got you covered though. Here are some tips on how to get a threesome as a single person.

Tip #1 – Be a woman

Yeah, this one may not be so helpful for many of you. Sorry!

But if you do happen to be a single woman, congratulations! Your odds of getting a threesome are very good indeed. In fact you’re pretty much set already.

Essentially, if you’re a single woman looking for a couple to have a threesome with you’re spoiled for choice beyond your wildest dreams.

Is your max pull normally a 6? – congratulations, when looking for a threesome you can bag an 8.. easily. Maybe even a 9 or 10.

Many couples are so desperate to find a woman for a threesome that you can literally choose any dating site, find a couple you like the look of and odds are they’ll be very interested to chat and check for chemistry.

There’s a reason females looking for no-strings attached threesomes with couples are usually referred to as ‘unicorns’. Most people feel they’re extremely hard to find, even borderline mythical (they’re wrong though, but that’s for another article)

Would we recommend going to a random site and banging the hottest couple there – No.. not really. But you do have that option. We’d suggest Tip #3 – even for women who could pick and choose. Guys however.. well.. your choices are basically only tips #2 and #3.. Sorry… Read on

Tip #2 – Go for a couple

A lot of guys reading out there are probably most interested in having a threesome with two women. Now, we get that. But realistically, finding two female strangers that both want to have sex with you, and each other, is a tall order. Sure, it’s not impossible – it’s just really hard.

Instead we’d suggest going for a fun lower hanging fruit, that may not be exactly what you had in mind originally, but may serve to get you there eventually. Namely, finding a couple looking for men.

There are many ways to go about this. You could go for an app like Tinder or Feeld (a lot of couples are on there), you could frequent a sex club (google sex clubs near you) or you could go to a dedicated sex dating site (there are different ones in most countries. A well-known Danish one is Scor – Comment down below with your favorite local one). Essentially, there are many roads to Rome here.

Is finding a couple as a single man going to be as easy as if you were a woman? No. Not even close. But it’s not unrealistic, especially if you know what your strengths and weaknesses are, and you’re not afraid to play to that. Are you really muscular? Show those abs. Do you have a big member? Don’t hide that fact. Can you be really dominant in bed? State that. Are you just the cutest most chill vanilla guy ever? Great, take lots of pictures of yourself in sweaters so the slightly insecure guy in the couple isn’t threatened by you.

Think about the fact that you’re not just convincing one person, you’re convincing two. The woman in the couple is only going to pick you if she’s attracted to you. You won’t attract women you wouldn’t normally be able to. So overall, you have little control there.

However, even if she thinks you’re attractive, her man might discard you because you rub him the wrong way or you don’t match their specific need for a third. If they’re an inexperienced vanilla couple looking for their first threesome, being as inoffensive, unthreatening and “normal” as possible is likely your best bet. If they’re a stag/vixen or dom/slutwife type couple, he’ll want a guy that’s good enough to have sex with his wife/girlfriend, but not so good that the guy outshines him. If instead, they’re a hotwife/cuckold type couple, they’ll likely want a guy who can be dominant with the wife/girlfriend and be passively or actively part of some level of mild to severe humiliation of the husband. There are many more kinks than just these, but those are common ones.

Determine which niche you can satisfy, find the right platform with lots of those couples and roll with it. If you don’t know which way to go, google the terms I wrote and watch a few hours of porn – you’ll probably get an idea. And hell, if you find your only option is vanilla, that’s okay too. It only changes which couples you target.

All in all, you should be thinking of yourself as a means for the couple to live out their fantasies. Be the enabler for them. That’s your best shot.

Now, at this point you might be saying “But Michael, how would having kinky sex with Tom and his wife lead to me eventually having sex with two women?” – I’ll tell you how: Stacking!

Tip #3 – Use “stacking”

“Stacking” is a term we made up for a practice we ourselves indulge in, as well as most experienced sexually open people we know. I want to say we coined the term, but that just sounds too pretentious.

It’s actually a really simple concept. It involves taking prior sexual experiences and treating them a bit like Lego bricks. Say you’re a single man who’s been on Tinder for a while. You want to try a threesome, but the opportunity hasn’t really come up. However, you have had casual sexual encounters with Lisa, Mary, Elisabeth and Tammy.

Now, say you knew that Mary was bisexual and Tammy was bicurious. Your easiest route to getting a threesome would now be to approach either Mary or Tammy and pitch the idea of finding a third together and that you might have a candidate. Say you approach Mary and she’s into the idea, you can now approach Tammy with not only the idea, but an actual woman she could have sex with if she wanted to with you. Since Tammy has already had sex with you and know you can satisfy her, the odds of getting a yes are a lot greater than with a random female stranger.

You can even take this one step further. Imagine you’ve already stacked twice. Your connections now look more like this:

The solid lines represent one-on-one encounters. The diamonds are stacked experiences, in this case two threesomes – one FFM (Female-Female-Male) threesome between you, Mary and Tammy, as well as one MMF (Male-Male-Female) threesome between you, Mary and her friend Peter, who she’s had sex with prior. You could now take all of this and pitch to Mary and Tammy that you bring in Peter for a foursome, creating this new stacked experience:

Finding people for foursomes, fivesomes, sixsomes (probably just called orgies at this point) would be very difficult without stacking, if not borderline impossible. This is how all the very successful sexually open people are doing it.

Also, having now had a foursome with you, Mary and Tammy, it would be perfectly reasonable for Peter to go ahead and have a threesome with Mary and Tammy alone. Something he may also never have tried before.
This is also where you guys from Tip #2 come into play and can lead to you eventually having a threesome with two women, even though you only had sex with couples. If you’d followed Tip #2, you might eventually get a network like this:

You’ve likely really enjoyed all of the threesomes, even though it wasn’t what you originally aimed for. However, Christopher & Lydia are special. You know they’re experienced and that they’ve had several threesomes beyond yours – several of them with women. Eventually, Christopher & Lydia will do what most experienced sexually open couples do – they’ll stack and suggest something like this:

As their reliable bull (also a sex term – google it), Christopher & Lydia saw it only fitting you get an invite to their annual Christmas sex party. An party at which you meet Maggy and Paulina – and can now take a page out of Peter’s book and make a new three-pronged stack.

Attributions

Post image courtesy of Stephen Leonardi – thank you.